Part 1

Roughly a year ago, my good friend Larry was in a car accident. On his way to work he was side swiped by a deer, leaving a huge, gaping dent in his car door. Upon hearing the news I had an ingenious idea for a prank. I quickly fabricated what would become one of the most ridiculous stories of all time. The story of The Deer Killer!

In my wife’s family there exists an inside joke amongst some of us about a certain family member who one time claimed a deer collided with the side of his truck, became lodged in the window and thrashed him, leaving him bruised and black eyed. In reality, this person had simply received a beating from some co-workers for having a big mouth. The story was fabricated to save face.

What person would ever believe such a ridiculous story? Well, turns out a few people in the family did (his wife and maybe one of the daughters). This got me thinking, did they actually believe the ridiculous tale simply because they wanted to, or in their eyes was it a legitimate, believable story.

I took the family member’s fabrication and adapted it to Larry’s story, but instead of Larry being the victim, he would become an epic character, a killer of beasts! I came to work and told the grand, tall tale style story to all of Larry’s former co-workers, creating the details on the fly. I told how the deer thrashed, kicked and gnarled and how Larry, clinging to life and in total desperation, reached for an auto hammer and dashed the creature’s brains out!

I traveled from office to office telling this tale, it became grander each time. Eventually the tale became a legend, an epic like Homer’s Odyssey. Over the course of a month congregations formed to hear the tale. I was asked to re-tell the story easily a dozen times those first few weeks. No one could believe that Larry, someone who appeared so quiet and strait laced, was capable of this. Despite all the ridiculousness, everyone did believe. I was amazed. Larry had become an office hero.

Months went by and eventually Larry told me another animal story about a groundhog he had captured, that was burrowing under the foundation of his home. His story included a little tidbit about his wife complaining at him to catch it. I ran with the new story to build onto the legend.

I still remember the morning I introduced the new tall tale. I burst into the office that day and told the story of an over worked and stressed out Larry, who couldn’t catch a break from his overbearing, nagging wife. Larry was now working 60 hour weeks at the big office down in Mid-town Atlanta and his wife grilled his ass day and night about this pest.

Eventually Larry snapped, he lured the groundhog into a cage, threw it in the back of his car and toted it down to the office with him. That day he parked at the top of the 4 story parking garage, walked to the edge and threw the furry fiend off the side of the building into a neighboring construction site! Larry had gone postal.

The office erupted in laughter and shock. They lapped up the story like a thirsty dog on a hot summer day. It was a huge hit. Now everybody knew one thing was certain, Larry was a certified badass, even more badass than ninjas, lumber jacks or Chuck Norris. They even all started referring to him as Badass-Larry.

In reality, Larry had simply released the burrowing creature down the street from his house.

Continue on to part II of The Greatest Prank of All Time!

Post Title: The Greatest Prank of All Time
Your Jackass Author: Peavey
Posted On: 3rd December 2008
Filed As: The Greatest Prank of All Time!
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