No other moment in cinematic history does a better job of conveying the intense and utter disgust so many office workers feel on a regular basis as that one golden scene from Office Space. Anybody who is familiar with the movie instantly knows the scene where Peter, Samir and Michael Bolton kick the hell out of and take a bat to the office printer.Of all the pieces of machinery found around the office, nothing else even comes close to consistently causing as much grief, pain and frustration as the printer.
Office workers everywhere unanimously agree that printers blow big ones. More times than not, the office printer is broke down, malfunctioning and making your life just a little bit shittier than it already is. In fact, I’d argue that every time we encounter a colleague committing suicide here at my place of work, nine times out of ten it was the printer that drove them over the edge. Check the suicide stats for your office and you may be surprised to find similar results.
But as much as I loathe office printers, I don’t really blame their suckiness on the printers or manufacturers themselves, it’s the idiots using the printers. In my office we have a 300 pound lady who prints hundreds of color flyers on lime green paper every month, then there’s the douche bag from down the hall that enjoys jamming the wrong sized paper into the incorrect tray. And let us not forget all the other geniuses out there who will stack up 30 pounds of documents in the loading tray to be copied. It’s no wonder the damn thing is always broke.
Our printer is broke down weekly. Tech after tech has visited our office and things never seem to get better. Our Ricoh (The Stinkoh as we’ve come to know it) has seen nearly a dozen different techs over the past couple years. Each eventually giving up and passing the torch to the next.
Well now our vendor has decided to bring in the big guns. This new tech has been with us every week now for at least six months and he’s not showing any sign of giving up. This tech is top notch. He’s the shit. I swear to God he’s the reincarnation of Einstein. That’s right folks! Einstein has been reincarnated (not dissimilar to the process the Dali Lama uses) and he’s come back to kick some laser printer ass.
Here is to you Einstein printer tech! Whip this pansy ass printer into shape and save another lost soul from the grips of suicide. Michael in IT depends on it, I can see death in his eyes!
One Comment
I remember that guy. Man, that was the funniest blog yet. How did you get him to pose for your camera? Man, he had to know that he was going to get made fun of.