A Warning to Those Who Grant the Hall Pass
As a child I had a very nervous stomach. Every day up until I graduated high school I’d be hit with the sudden urges to take huge dumps at school, always at the worse possible times.My irritable bowel syndrome was never a problem I could shake until I hit college. I guess the anonymity of the university, a place full of thousands of faces who knew nothing about me put me at ease as opposed to high school, a place full of a few hundred kids always snickering and judging each other behind each other’s backs.
Nearly every day at school I would have to ask to be excused to the restroom very suddenly. Sometimes teachers were cool, they’d give you a hall pass or tell you to grab one on the way out the door, let you do your business and come back. But then there were always the asshole teachers. The ones that were probably burned a few times by stupid kids abusing the privilege to take a piss or a dump and now decided no one was allowed to do so.
I can understand a teacher being wary of the kid that always looks for a reason to be out of the class room but what about those that have to seriously take a dump or pee? When you’ve gotta go, you’ve gotta go! I still have nightmarish memories of grabbing the seat of my desk, pulling myself down as tightly as I could, praying that the urge would subside just ‘til the end of the period. Thank God the days of the hall pass are over for me.
Well, now it appears all the school children of the world, the children who are what I once was have a new hero. Someone to look to for guidance, someone who has set the example for the rest of us to follow! He is… The Urinator!
Apparently a middle school teacher in Orlando wouldn’t allow one of her students to go to the bathroom and made the (most likely) sarcastic remark that he could take a piss in her lunch box if he really had to go that bad, so what did the kid we’ve now come to know as The Urinator do? He grabbed his teacher’s lunchbox, went behind a bookcase and urinated in it then returned the lunchbox to her!
I can only come to a few conclusions, either this kid is a badass or he’s totally retarded and took her literal. The badass scenario would prove more appropriate for role of The Urinator, but I’m secretly hoping it was some poor kid with Down’s syndrome since that seems much funnier to me.
Hopefully we’ll hear more about this soon.
Read about it HERE!